Forgotten from Childhood (Hilarious)
Apr. 25th, 2010 04:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kigsDear Internet,
Like many American rug rats, I lost an entire summer to Cable television.
Before then, I spent my summers doing classic "old fashioned" things with my summer vacation. Examples include running through the sprinklers, playing street hockey, riding my bike, and causing general mischief. My entire childhood consisted of scraped knees, bruised elbows, and stitches. I loved it. At age 24, I sometimes feel that I owe my parents an apology for ever being a kid.
Then I hear about what monstrosities they inflicted on my grandparents, and suddenly I don't feel so bad. My mother and her siblings grew up in Mexico, and apparently American Childhoods are mild in comparison. Their childhood stories revolve around getting bitten by dogs and throwing each other into walls. Silly kids.
Things progressed as usual until, one day, my family purchased cable television. BAM! I lost an entire summer vacation sitting placidly in front of a television. I had the entire programming schedule memorized. Kids would knock on my door and ask me to play hockey, and I would politely decline because "Legends of the Hidden Temple" was about to come on.
Cable Television Ate My Childhood!!
Thankfully, I managed to escape its jagged grasp and rejoin society. Nowadays, I don't even have cable. It's expensive, and most of the programming is cheaper to watch online or to buy the DVD. I will never get that summer back.
In honor of lost summers, I have decided to share some entertainment with you wonderful internet people. For everyone who has ever lost a summer to Alf, Little House on the Prairie, or Dinosaurs. Compliments of Bob, I present to you, the 7 most Soul Crushing Season Finales on Television.
Here's a sneak peak; the ending to my personal favorite childhood fossilized sitcom: Dinosaurs
I think I actually watched this Season Finale, and blocked it out of my memory. My stubborn little boy brain refused to believe that my favorite show had ended with the Extinction of all of its stars.
Truly,
Kigs
Like many American rug rats, I lost an entire summer to Cable television.
Before then, I spent my summers doing classic "old fashioned" things with my summer vacation. Examples include running through the sprinklers, playing street hockey, riding my bike, and causing general mischief. My entire childhood consisted of scraped knees, bruised elbows, and stitches. I loved it. At age 24, I sometimes feel that I owe my parents an apology for ever being a kid.
Then I hear about what monstrosities they inflicted on my grandparents, and suddenly I don't feel so bad. My mother and her siblings grew up in Mexico, and apparently American Childhoods are mild in comparison. Their childhood stories revolve around getting bitten by dogs and throwing each other into walls. Silly kids.
Things progressed as usual until, one day, my family purchased cable television. BAM! I lost an entire summer vacation sitting placidly in front of a television. I had the entire programming schedule memorized. Kids would knock on my door and ask me to play hockey, and I would politely decline because "Legends of the Hidden Temple" was about to come on.
Cable Television Ate My Childhood!!
Thankfully, I managed to escape its jagged grasp and rejoin society. Nowadays, I don't even have cable. It's expensive, and most of the programming is cheaper to watch online or to buy the DVD. I will never get that summer back.
In honor of lost summers, I have decided to share some entertainment with you wonderful internet people. For everyone who has ever lost a summer to Alf, Little House on the Prairie, or Dinosaurs. Compliments of Bob, I present to you, the 7 most Soul Crushing Season Finales on Television.
Here's a sneak peak; the ending to my personal favorite childhood fossilized sitcom: Dinosaurs
I think I actually watched this Season Finale, and blocked it out of my memory. My stubborn little boy brain refused to believe that my favorite show had ended with the Extinction of all of its stars.
Truly,
Kigs
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no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 12:29 am (UTC)How utterly depressing a conclusion.
no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 02:20 am (UTC)Also - I had no idea that was how Dinosaurs ended. I only remember it as Family Matters, but with dinosaurs, and that the baby was basically the Urkel of the show.
...soul crushing is right. My god.
no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 02:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 08:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 03:19 am (UTC)I think I saw the ending of Dinosaurs on my grandma's TV in Taiwan (subtitled in Chinese) and remember finding it kinda "oh! that ties in neatly with what we thought killed the dinosaurs." Dark humor it is indeed!
no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 08:37 am (UTC)I did a quick wiki, and found the following list:
"environmentalism, women's rights, sexual harassment, objectification of women, censorship, civil rights, body image, steroid use, allusions to masturbation (in the form of Robbie getting caught doing a mating dance by himself), drug abuse, racism, peer pressure, rights of indigenous peoples, corporate crime, government interference of parenting, and allusions to homosexuality and communism (in the guise of herbivorism)."
The Mating Dance by Himself. That's one of the best euphemisms ever.
no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 05:53 pm (UTC)And now, the mating dance!
no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 04:10 am (UTC)Also, it was years before I got the joke about their last name.
no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 08:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 01:53 pm (UTC)*the more you know*
no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 07:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 01:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-04-26 09:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-04-27 01:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-04-28 05:46 pm (UTC)